The new me.
Well, Tate has officially reached twenty weeks old. Everyone told me “time goes so fast”, but I can tell you right now, 20 weeks feels like 3 years. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tate more than anything, and I love being his Mumma, but dang it is hard. Everyone tells you it’s hard, but I swear no one told me it would be THIS hard.
Long labour. Rough birth. Neonates. Baby blues. Bleeding. Engorgement. Colic. No sleep. Insomnia. Postnatal anxiety. Covid.
The list could go on really.
Even now, typing this I have my haakaa pump on my engorged boob trying to take the pressure off while Tate finally sleeps after a big dose of Panadol to control his Covid fever. Poor little dude.
I adore this little man. He knows when I am struggling, all he has to do is smile and me with his cheeky smile and I melt. Nothing else matters in that moment. I could sit and stare at him all day - and I do. I finally get him to sleep, then I spend the time when he is asleep scrolling through photos of him.
Pre-Tate Hayley was your typical A-Type personality, organised, ‘in control’. I was measured and could always see both sides of the situation. I worked my ass off at uni getting my bachelors and honours in science, then a masters in finance and human resource management. My career took off in the last few years and I got 2 promotions in the space of 2 years. Any challenge I could strategise my way through.
I know if I could just take back a tiny bit of control, or get myself slightly organised, I would be able to see through this fog and endless pile of laundry and multi coloured toys.
So… where to start with this…
We’ll, after 19 weeks, I decided to set up my planner again. Take everything out of it and start fresh. I know you planner peeps know the satisfaction of that! I plan to spend the next 2 weeks trialling different ways to use different inserts for taking control of my new life.
I will write. Focus. Meditate. Plan. Track and I will share it all. Sharing helps me collect my thoughts, and hearing from other Mums reminds me how motherhood truely is a sisterhood.
Stay tuned…
